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Simplify Yourself

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Get realistic and honest about how you wholeheartedly desire to live your life.


“The purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost,

to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience.”

Eleanor Roosevelt

Despite our modern world belief systems, we simply do not have enough time and energy to do all the things. Simplifying yourself and your life opens up space so you can a deep look at yourself and what you most want to do with your precious life. A great place to start is looking at your fantasy selves. A popular phrase coined by minimalist, author, and blogger Francine Jay, fantasy selves represent all the versions of ourselves that we think we want to to be. For most of my life and into my mid-thirties I thought I wanted to do it all, and I kept convincing myself I could do it all. I could work full time; be a mama, partner, friend, sister, daughter, student of life; organize myself, my son, my life, and my home; travel; spend time with loved ones; practice self-care; practice yoga; camp; hike; bike; read; take workshops; learn to cook; do laundry and clean my home, just to name a few.

Sometime in 2017-ish, while reading Francine’s post, Declutter Your Fantasy Self, I felt immediate resonance and relief. Oh, hell’s bells… I thought. Of course! How incredible would it feel to let go of all those fantasy versions of myself?! {deep breath} As I wrote a list of my unrealized selves, and all the clutter in tow, I was able to feel how much of my life force had been blocked by things that did not provide value or meaning in my life. I became willing to release them and make room for what was really true for me. As I said goodbye to these fantasy selves and the clutter connected to them, I opened up to a new way of living and being.

All too often, we hold on to stuff because it represents who we think we should be, rather than who we are. Sometimes our fantasy selves are meant to impress others; sometimes they’re relics of our past; sometimes they’re fantasies about our future. Whatever the case, it’s important to remember: acquiring stuff for your fantasy self doesn’t make it a reality. Most of the time, it only leads to a lot of nice clutter you never actually use. – Francine Jay

What fantasy selves are you holding onto that don’t match your current life? What material stuff is crowding your space, external and internal? I invite you to write a list of your own fantasy selves and all of the stuff connected to them.

Examples of fantasy selves and their potential clutter…

  • Outdoors fanatic – bicycling, hiking, camping, and ski gear; beach gear and toys, yard toys, and hammocks.
  • Crafty Betty – sewing machine, notions, lots of material; paper, paints, scissors; knitting needles and yarn.
  • Book Worm – a library full of books you have read, books you hope to read, and books from schooling.
  • Music Lover – shelves of CD’s or records, technology old and new, and instruments you might play someday.
  • Photographer – cameras, tripods, cords of every shape and size, boxes of photos, and digital photos galore.
  • World Traveler – Suitcases and travel accessories in all different types and sizes, maps, and books on travel.
  • Chef extraordinaire – pots, pans, mixing bowls, cooking utensils, and ingredients a plenty.
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Wouldn’t it feel great to get clarity about how you most desire to live your life, to make conscious choices about how you spend your days, and cultivate a life that brings you joy and deep satisfaction?!

Your Guide to a Simpler Life, Kate Fehr

A passionate teacher of The Clear & Simple Way© to transform your life.

Simplify Your Life Homepage
Clear & Simple, SEE IT. MAP IT. DO IT., Simplify Your Life

Deepen the transformation with our Simplify Your Life eBook.

The Simple Life… ha! We get the absurdity of even uttering those words. With all of the roles, responsibilities, relationships, children, 4-legged children, tasks, events, emails, papers, belongings, needs, wants, and more, life is anything but simple. It is complex, multi-faceted, and ever-changing. So, is a simpler life even possible? Is there really hope? Yes, you can craft a different kind of life. Enjoy reading about simplifying change, choices, play, sharing, growth, and more.

By simplifying, you will be more present and available for what life puts in front of you. You will enjoy the small things. And you will live with grace and gratitude.

Welcome to Simplify Your Life. This eBook will set you at ease, inspire you to play, awaken your senses and open you to new ways of being. No matter how big, complicated or busy your life is, it can be simpler. Are you ready to love the life you already have?

Buy Now

Simply Sit

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A simple practice for anyone, anytime, is to sit. Just sit. Just breathe. Just be.

In an age of constant movement,

nothing is more important than sitting still.

Pico Iyer

A simple practice for anyone, anytime, is to sit. Just sit. Just breathe. Just be. How long has it been since you did this? I’m not talking about meditating or any activity that requires focus. I am asking you to sit still and simply be with yourself and the world around you. There are times all throughout your day to do this. It only requires giving yourself permission.

I keep noticing my resistance to sitting still. My comfort zone is being busy. When I think about just sitting my brain goes to what can I do? Crazy right?! I recently read a wonderful book, The Sacred Enneagram, by Christopher L. Heuertz. Christopher shares a practice called engaging solitude, where he suggests taking 20 minutes a day to sit quietly with myself. I have been doing this for months now and it is blissful. I hadn’t realized how pressured I always felt to be doing something. I now give myself permission to do nothing.

It can fun to discover your favorite place or time for sitting still. Personally, I love my morning sit with my cup of strong, black coffee. The world is quiet, my body barely awake, and I get to sit. There is no doing involved, simply breathing and being in my body in the moment. I am always delighted, and often surprised, at what pops up to be noticed. I also love to end my day with sitting outside staring at the night sky.

Sweet ideas for sitting still.

  • Begin or end the day with sitting on your porch. Hang out with yourself.
  • Take five minutes to sit at your desk at the beginning or end of the work day.
  • Take five minutes to sit in your car after the work day before you head home.
  • Go sit in the grass or lean on a tree.  Let your body touch the earth.
  • Sit at the edge of a river, a stream or the ocean. Feel the water.
  • Sit in the sun or the rain or the moonlight.
  • Sit in your favorite bookstore or coffee shop.
  • Plop in your  comfiest chair, without the TV on or a book in your hand.
  • Sit in front of a fire, either in your home or in the forest.  Let yourself get lost.
  • Sit next to your child or loved one and simply breathe each other in.

Let yourself simply sit right now, wherever you are. Give yourself 5 minutes. You might be surprised. You might feel something new or let go of something old. Try this simple practice.  I hope you will get hooked and make it part of your everyday life.

Your Guide to a Simpler Life, Marla Dee

We love teaching the Clear & Simple Way© to live free of clutter and get organized at last.

Simplify Your Life Homepage
Clear & Simple, SEE IT. MAP IT. DO IT., Simplify Your Life

Deepen the transformation with our Simplify Your Life eBook.

The Simple Life… ha! We get the absurdity of even uttering those words. With all of the roles, responsibilities, relationships, children, 4-legged children, tasks, events, emails, papers, belongings, needs, wants, and more, life is anything but simple. It is complex, multi-faceted, and ever-changing. So, is a simpler life even possible? Is there really hope? Yes, you can craft a different kind of life. Enjoy reading about simplifying change, choices, play, sharing, growth, and more.

By simplifying, you will be more present and available for what life puts in front of you. You will enjoy the small things. And you will live with grace and gratitude.

Welcome to Simplify Your Life. This eBook will set you at ease, inspire you to play, awaken your senses and open you to new ways of being. No matter how big, complicated or busy your life is, it can be simpler. Are you ready to love the life you already have?

Buy Now

Simply Play

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I learned how to play from my daughter.

Play is the spark that keeps our fire burning!

Marla Dee

My daughter Jessica is in her late 20’s. All her life, she has taught me how to play. I tend to forget that play is a part of life. I forget that play happens every day. I forget that play nurtures me. I forget how to just have fun. I was taught when you get all the work done, then you can play. The dilemma here is that the work is never done. So, I’ve adopted my daughter’s approach of bringing in play at every opportunity.  At this moment, I am in my comfy clothes, curled up on the couch, surrounded by pillows, coffee cup beside me, laptop in my lap, writing. Life does not get sweeter than this. I am having fun. I have come a long way. I have learned from a master.

Simple play ideas that my daughter has taught me:

  • Play with a kitten or puppy. If you are really brave, bring one home with you.
  • Go to the park and let loose in the playground. Get on a swing.
  • Color or draw. Why not splurge on a new pack of crayons or colored pencils.
  • Climb a tree. Collect rocks. Dig in the dirt.
  • Pack a yummy picnic and eat in your yard or on your porch.
  • Put on music and dance in your living room. Really let loose.
  • Have a slumber party followed by breakfast in bed.
  • Read a story then let yourself get lost in it. Isn’t it amazing how hours go by?
  • Play hooky for one hour during your work week. Be daring.
  • Cook with your fingers. Eat with your fingers. Yep, get messy.
  • Let a song or a story come out of you. Go ahead, do it right now.
  • Watch a movie you’ve seen before and act it out.
  • Or you can play at being different animals or characters.
  • Wrestle around on your living room floor – hug, tickle, laugh, let go and just love.

Lastly, invite a playmate into your life. I did, unexpectedly. Back in the fall of 1994, I was meditating outside on a beautiful, warm day. All of a sudden, I heard a little voice inside me say Hi, Mom! I looked down at my still flat stomach and asked, am I pregnant? Yes, she replied, so simply & sweetly. Why now, I asked, for I had been waiting for her to come for years and had given up. I will never forget her response, because you are ready for joy in your life. To this day, the memory of that moment grabs me in the gut. She came to remind that life is about joy, about play, about creating. She awakened my long lost child. She brought me back to life.

So, I insist that you play today! Be spontaneous. Start simple, start small or go for it and take a whole day. Just do it. This is not about planning, it’s about being. Play is the spark that keeps our fire burning.

Your Guide to a Simpler Life, Marla Dee

We love teaching the Clear & Simple Way© to live free of clutter and get organized at last.

Simplify Your Life Homepage
Clear & Simple, SEE IT. MAP IT. DO IT., Simplify Your Life

Deepen the transformation with our Simplify Your Life eBook.

The Simple Life… ha! We get the absurdity of even uttering those words. With all of the roles, responsibilities, relationships, children, 4-legged children, tasks, events, emails, papers, belongings, needs, wants, and more, life is anything but simple. It is complex, multi-faceted, and ever-changing. So, is a simpler life even possible? Is there really hope? Yes, you can craft a different kind of life. Enjoy reading about simplifying change, choices, play, sharing, growth, and more.

By simplifying, you will be more present and available for what life puts in front of you. You will enjoy the small things. And you will live with grace and gratitude.

Welcome to Simplify Your Life. This eBook will set you at ease, inspire you to play, awaken your senses and open you to new ways of being. No matter how big, complicated or busy your life is, it can be simpler. Are you ready to love the life you already have?

Buy Now

Simply Share

by

Share your hope, your insights, your fear, your gratitude, and your love

Share what is in your heart

as well as what’s in your head.

Kate Fehr

From Kate…

As someone who thrives on being outdoors and socially connected face-to-face, the quarantining and social distancing in 2020 and 2021 caused me great stress and, at times, spurred threats of rebellion. But as time went on, I kept noticing how sharing what was true for me from my heart supported me in feeling more positive and grateful. In response to all of that, I welcomed more video chats and made more phone calls than texting. I created more time to share my experiences and invited others to share theirs. I read and watched more of the goodness that landed in my email inbox and unsubscribed to distractions from the goodness. My invitation to you is to make time to share. Share your fears, your joys, your hope, your frustrations, your gratitude. Share what is alive for you today.

Here are three of my favorite articles shared during the pandemic whose messages are helpful any time.

From Marla…
There is a lot of noise out there in our world. In the moment, it probably feels ok to repeat what you are hearing, without giving much thought to whether it is true for you and what affect it will have. I want to challenge you to be conscious about what you are sharing and how. One day during the pandemic I had two treats shared with me. My daughter Sarah sent me a short video of her flowers blooming in their backyard. This meant the world to me since I no longer live close to them. Then my brother spoke up on our family text line and asked that we no longer talk about the virus but focus on personal sharing and connecting with each other. So, I got to experience that sharing sweetness can be simple and standing up for honorable sharing matters. I know I want my sharing to add guidance, insight, wisdom and hope. What about you? What affect are your words having?

Here are shares from three of my favorite messengers.

  • Erin Elizabeth Wells – “This is the time to practice radical responsibility. Will you slump into being a victim of life or will you claim your role as the captain of your ship?”
  • Renee Trudeau – “As you reflect on what your life is trying to tell you, invite in curiosity, compassion, and ask for support from trusted friends. And remember, just because the veil has been lifted, doesn’t mean you have to rush to action.”  What is this time illuminating for you
  • Michael A. Singer –  “Our primary job is to have clarity on the inside so we can take right action on the outside.” An interview by Tami Simon of Sounds True. Resilience in Challenging Times

Lastly, our funny share comes from Karen Kingston, author of Clear Your Clutter with Feng Shui. Karen lives in the UK and she pokes fun at our toilet paper panic during the early COVID days.

We hope that you are sharing and receiving what you need. Trust, be open, grow, give and thrive.

Your Guides to a Simpler Life, Marla Dee & Kate Fehr

We love teaching the Clear & Simple Way to live free of clutter and get organized at last.

Simplify Your Life Homepage
Clear & Simple, SEE IT. MAP IT. DO IT., Simplify Your Life

Deepen the transformation with our Simplify Your Life eBook.

The Simple Life… ha! We get the absurdity of even uttering those words. With all of the roles, responsibilities, relationships, children, 4-legged children, tasks, events, emails, papers, belongings, needs, wants, and more, life is anything but simple. It is complex, multi-faceted, and ever-changing. So, is a simpler life even possible? Is there really hope? Yes, you can craft a different kind of life. Enjoy reading about simplifying change, choices, play, sharing, growth, and more.

By simplifying, you will be more present and available for what life puts in front of you. You will enjoy the small things. And you will live with grace and gratitude.

Welcome to Simplify Your Life. This eBook will set you at ease, inspire you to play, awaken your senses and open you to new ways of being. No matter how big, complicated or busy your life is, it can be simpler. Are you ready to love the life you already have?

Buy Now

Simplify Choices

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Taking responsiblity for my choices takes courage.

The impetus of all human behavior is the yearning for freedom. Freedom is to be at-choice in every condition or circumstance.

Most of humanity is rearely at-choice: we simply repeat the old reaction patterns. This is not choice at all, this is unconciousness.

You see, choice implies awareness. Increasing our awareness imporves our choices, which in turn determines our freedom.

Otis Woodard | www.adept.global

Reclaim the power of personal choice. A simpler life begins with awareness of my power to choose. Do I acknowledge that my life today is my creation? Am I willing to be accountable for past choices and their affect on my life? By answering yes, I am set free! I am empowered to make a new choice, to make any choice. I come to know that my current choice will affect all things from this point forward. I get to choose the direction I wish to go. Simple, yet huge. It helps me understand why I distract myself or play the victim and want to make someone or something else responsible for my choices. Taking responsibility for my choices takes courage.

Years ago, I attended a weekend retreat, led by a modern-day warrior, Otis Woodard. Otis cuts through the layers of self deception to help others reclaim the power of choice. The retreat was entitled Clearing the Past and I went there with a specific intent. Within hours I created the perfect excuse to run or to face my old way. I was paralyzed knowing that I didn’t want to run, yet feeling the strong pull of my past pattern (my old choices) tugging at me. I chose to stay. I am grateful for this gift to myself. By being accountable for my choice I got to learn and change my direction. I learned I am not my emotions or my mind talk. I let them come up and move through me. I then chose to let them go and settle into my heart. My heart is wise. My heart is my center and can always guide me. I heard stay, listen and open. This one choice changed the direction of my life.

What choice lies in front of you today that you have been procrastinating or avoiding? Are you willing to look at the message the universe is offering you? All choices in your life become simpler when you take accountability for making them.

 

Guidelines for making clear choices.

  • Which choice is life supportive?
  • Which choice grows me?
  • Which choice feels right in my gut?
  • Which choice opens my heart?
  • Which choice brings me peace?
  • Which choice reflects my truth?
  • Which choice takes me to the next step?
  • Which choice deepens love and connection?

Choose to reclaim your power by embracing the choices in front of you. You can keep it simple by starting with one. What is a daily choice that would support the direction you want to grow? Today I choose to take my morning walk. Today I choose to call a friend. Today I choose to eat a healthy lunch. What will you choose to do?

Your Guide, Marla Dee.

I love teaching the Clear & Simple Way to live free of clutter and get organized at last.

Simplify Your Life Homepage
Clear & Simple, SEE IT. MAP IT. DO IT., Simplify Your Life

Deepen the transformation with our Simplify Your Life eBook.

The Simple Life… ha! We get the absurdity of even uttering those words. With all of the roles, responsibilities, relationships, children, 4-legged children, tasks, events, emails, papers, belongings, needs, wants, and more, life is anything but simple. It is complex, multi-faceted, and ever-changing. So, is a simpler life even possible? Is there really hope? Yes, you can craft a different kind of life. Enjoy reading about simplifying change, choices, play, sharing, growth, and more.

By simplifying, you will be more present and available for what life puts in front of you. You will enjoy the small things. And you will live with grace and gratitude.

Welcome to Simplify Your Life. This eBook will set you at ease, inspire you to play, awaken your senses and open you to new ways of being. No matter how big, complicated or busy your life is, it can be simpler. Are you ready to love the life you already have?

Buy Now

Simplify Change

by

Change has the power to destroy us or transform us.

An old saying:

There is no pain in change. There is no pain in growth.

There is only pain in resistance to change and resistance to growth.

Unknown

We live in complicated times where change is happening faster than we can handle. Our bodies, minds and hearts are bombarded constantly. Simplifying the effects that changes bring can help us navigate the fast waters.

Why do I resist change? It is all around me. It is inside me. It is constant. It is life. But, my body doesn’t know what’s coming and anxiety takes over. So I cling to the old, the comfortable. I keep doing the same daily routine, using the same excuse or the old tool, long after the growth is gone. Would a plant resist pushing through the soil and reaching for the sun?  Would it struggle to make itself different than its makeup? Would it expect other plants to go against their nature? Would it say to the earth, stop growing me now, I’ve done enough? No, the plant would adjust to the elements and change. Am I different? Am I different from the rest of nature? Even with all my human intricacies, I am still a body on the earth plane. My body carries a genetic plan of growth. My soul carries its karmic plan of growth. I can resist this or surrender to the ecstasy of living it.

In my business, as a professional organizer, I am a guide for change. I see people struggle with it daily. I see the cost of resistance. I am there to support them in the new. My greatest joy is seeing them open up to change and then transform. The manage to make it through the muck and emerge. Yet in my personal life I have been stuck. I have carried a belief that change meant struggle. Years ago, a friend kept looking me in the eye and saying “change is good, change is good, change is good“. I spent many months saying this out loud as I let go of my old block. Today I can laugh at my resistance. Today I trust change. I embrace change. I can even enjoy it. I am grateful for this change in my belief. Remember, a miracle is simply a shift in perception.

Are you open to a simple shift in your understanding of change? Rather than focusing on the unknown, start with simple acceptance of what is. Let your body and your mind accept the present moment. Then simply be willing to change. You can trust in the natural process. Believe me, life will give you what you need next. You don’t have to figure it out first.

Acceptance, Release, Trust. Choose a mantra to help you today.

  • I accept myself, with that I accept my life as it is today.
  • I accept that I will change today. I accept one change today.
  • I accept that anything around me could change today.
  • I release the need to control what’s coming.
  • I release struggle and find joy in change today.
  • I release the old way or old stuff.
  • I trust change. I can start with a small one and build up.
  • I trust the gift that change brings. I trust life.

Now focus on the gift. Let the universe bring in something or someone new, something that has the power to grow you in this moment. Then accept the gift. Change will be simpler if you just let it unfold.

Your Guide, Marla Dee.

I love teaching the Clear & Simple Way to live free of clutter and get organized at last.

Simplify Your Life Homepage
Clear & Simple, SEE IT. MAP IT. DO IT., Simplify Your Life

Deepen the transformation with our Simplify Your Life eBook.

The Simple Life… ha! We get the absurdity of even uttering those words. With all of the roles, responsibilities, relationships, children, 4-legged children, tasks, events, emails, papers, belongings, needs, wants, and more, life is anything but simple. It is complex, multi-faceted, and ever-changing. So, is a simpler life even possible? Is there really hope? Yes, you can craft a different kind of life. Enjoy reading about simplifying change, choices, play, sharing, growth, and more.

By simplifying, you will be more present and available for what life puts in front of you. You will enjoy the small things. And you will live with grace and gratitude.

Welcome to Simplify Your Life. This eBook will set you at ease, inspire you to play, awaken your senses and open you to new ways of being. No matter how big, complicated or busy your life is, it can be simpler. Are you ready to love the life you already have?

Buy Now