by CS Team
How to get along when we attract our opposite! Organization can help or hinder.
Why is it that “Mr. Organized” partners with “Ms. Chaos”? The universe is funny that way, always trying to balance things out. Think about how often you are at odds with someone in your life because of organization issues:
- Not being able to find what your boss is looking for.
- Arguing with your child about the way their room looks.
- Being accused of throwing important things away.
- Always being asked where something is.
As professional organizers we constantly witness the stress in our clients relationships over organization styles and decisions. Sometimes our work feels more like therapy, especially when it comes to couples. Too often those with the ability to organize do not understand when others cannot maintain their environment. Those that are organized need to keep in mind that our research shows only 10 – 15% of the population is naturally organized. Hence, the need to be able to communicate and get help when lack of organization gets in the way.
This barrier between those who naturally know how to organize and the other 90% who don’t is why our main focus is teaching people how. The foundation for any organizing project or communication is three simple steps outlined below.
SEE IT – take a look at where you’ve been
Begin by taking a realistic look at where a lack of organization is impacting your life and relationships. Choose just one area or issue. What’s working, what’s not and why? Keep it simple. Then look at it from both sides and try to see what is at the heart of the conflict. Often our relationships serve as mirrors to look at ourselves. Once you have clarity, why not share your truth with this person and ask them to share.
MAP IT – make a plan for where you want to go
Now that you have each shared your truth, each person can create a simple vision for what needs to change. Try asking – what is the single most important change that needs to happen? What is one action you can take? Let this be enough. It is imperative to the relationship that each person has a chance to share their vision and what is important to them.
DO IT – take the actions to make it happen
How you choose to implement your changes or DO IT will be very specific to the relationship. Some may come up with a way to do it together, while others might call in outside help, and still others will compromise on different levels.
Some examples of this are:
- A family sets up a system for incoming mail and an active paper system together.
- A mother and child call it fun time, put on music, and make a game of putting everything away.
- A couple decides to hire a professional organizer because they would rather enjoy their time together hiking or taking dance lessons.
- A boss and assistant set up a weekly 1 hour focused time to go through all the lists and questions.
- Two friends or buddies get excited about helping each other one weekend a month with the clutter areas – We all have them you know.
We hope we have given you inspiration and guidance to bring more peace and joy into your relationships.
We would love to hear back from you – what happened? Please share your stories!!
Marla, Kate & Team
by CS Team
Creating and caring for a home together is often challenging. We each have a relationship with our stuff and patterns that show up in our space. When it comes to mixing our stuff with someone else all kinds of issues can arise…
- I need stuff out where I can see it and he wants it all tucked away
- I like a simple space and she is a collector
- What do we do with all the double’s now that we are living together
- Why do you need these old T-shirts that are 30 years old – or your grandma’s china
Our TOP THREE TIPS for creating shared space are –
1 – A Room to YOURSELF. Each of you gets one room (or space) that is ALL YOURS! It gets to look the way you want, have the stuff you want and function how you want. It is your space to keep your way. This tip is critical for long-lasting relationship contentment.
2 – A Room you both LOVE. It is vital to have one room in the home (preferably the bedroom) that you both love to be in together. You have each shared in the choices for furniture, colors, the stuff and the feel. It is free of clutter or other people’s stuff. This is your sweet space to share with each other.
3 – The MAGIC Question? When it comes time to organize another area, or to do any kind of project together – start with the magical question. This question brings together the SEE IT.© (take a look at where you are) and MAP IT.© (make a plan for where you want to go) Steps and makes it simple. Ask how do you want the new space to look, feel and function? Each of you write your answers and then share with each other. You will get insights, save time & money and decrease your stress by doing this.
These TIPS are taken from almost 20 years of working with hundreds of couples. Since we all tend to attract our opposite in some way, these tips can make a huge difference in your relationship. We would love to hear from you!
Marla, Kate & Team
SEE IT.© MAP IT.© – click here for more info
by CS Team
Your space, your home, your office, your car, your desktop… are simply reflecting who you are and what is going on inside you. So what story would they tell if you were looking in from the outside?
Pause right now and go to your favorite room, or the room you spend the most time in. Take a look around and notice what thoughts arise. What about the sensations that are coming up in your body. Let your senses find a voice and speak to you. Take it in and trust whatever is shared. Who knows, you might even be surprised.
Here are some one-line story headings. What would yours be?
- I like comfy & color
- I’m tired and overwhelmed
- I enjoy beauty and peace
- I have too much stuff
- I am a soft person
- I’m simple – or – I’m complicated
- I like being messy – it’s who I am
- I need lots of color – or – I need neutrals
- My space is full of other people’s stuff
- I am a minimalist
- I absolutely love being organized
- Everything has a home – or – I don’t where to put things
- Everything needs to be out so I can see it.
My environment is an external reflection of my internal reality! Sharon Benedict www.newinkcopy.com
Now go further and ask, does your space support or drain you? There is no right or wrong here; this is about noticing. This is the SEE IT© Step in action (take a look at where you’ve been). Does your space reflect who you are in present time? Or do you now want to make a change? We invite you to share your insight with anyone close to you and ask about them. We would love to hear your stories!
Marla, Kate & Team
NOTE – Visit www.TheHomeEnhancer.com if you want help changing your story. Marion Mandala will transform your space into a place you love to be! She lives in the Portland, OR area but also offers virtual sessions. You can connect with her at 503-953-5976.
SEE IT.© Take a look at where you’ve been – click here for more info
by CS Team
Sometimes a simple question brings the answer you need most. Just ask & listen!
Daily life is often overwhelming. There is so much information coming at us all the time. There are decisions to be made and actions to take. Sometimes taking a 10 minute break to breathe, center, ground and tune in is the best thing to do.
We have chosen six potent questions from six wise guides that you can use anytime. They are especially helpful when you are feeling stuck or unsure. These questions apply SEE IT. MAP IT. DO IT. © to whatever is going on right now. You can also use them for big things like getting clear for your whole year!!
Note: we are also sharing who was the source of each question to express gratitude and make it easy for you to get more from them.
1 – What is the change I am ready for? – Marla Dee
Let the answer come in easily and trust your gut. My favorite quote for change – There is no pain in change, there is no pain in growth. There is only pain in resistance to change and resistance to growth. Anonymous
2 – What is the role I need to focus on right now? – Jinny Ditzler
By acknowledging the role that needs your attention, you can release the others and be present. Jinny also teaches that choosing one ROLE to focus on for the whole year is life changing. We agree.
3 – If I had 10 seconds left to live, what would my message be? – Shelly Coray
Shelly is a powerful messenger for clearing up the MESS in your head. This stunning question cuts to the very core and gets rid of all the distractions. Ask this NOW – what would your message be?
4 – When do I feel alive and my best self? – Terry Sidford
Terry believes that following your passion is the key; both in the moment and in your life. This question help you tap into your true life force.
5 – What is my body telling me? – Mary Nickle
Mary is a healer and master of aligning the body with intuition. Mary teaches that your body always tells the truth. The body is wise and has so much to share. Your body is just waiting for you to listen.
6 – What is the next step?- Sylvia Nibley
The invitation to you – choose one (or more) of these questions. Take a time out to center, ask, listen and then write what comes? Please share with us anytime. We would love to witness you in the moment.
The wise women who shared the questions above can be found here…
Marla Dee – The Clear & SIMPLE Way
Jinny Ditzler – Your Best Year Yet
Shelly Coray – Master Your Mindset
Terry Sidford – Create Your Life Coaching
Mary Nickle – Time Out Associates
Sylvia Nibley – The Inquiry Cards
We hope you find clarity in the moment. We want you to know that your life matters in this world!
Big love,
Marla, Kate & Team
SEE IT – Take a look at where you’ve been | MAP IT – Make a plan for where you want to go | DO IT – take the steps to get there. SEE IT. MAP IT. DO IT. © Clear & SIMPLE, LLC. All rights reserved
by CS Team
Let’s take a look at your Bedroom. Is it time for a change?
Is your bedroom a sanctuary or a dumping ground? As professional organizers we are often asked, “where should I start organizing in my home? There is clutter and chaos everywhere.” Your bedroom is the place to start!
The bedroom often becomes the landing zone for homeless items, or the make shift home office, the TV room, or even a place where a person can’t sleep anymore because there is so much clutter. This breaks my heart.
Your bedroom is meant to be a place of rest, relaxation, intimacy and healing. You spend more time here than anywhere else. It can be a favorite room in the early morning and late evening. One of the best gifts you can give yourself, especially in the cold months of winter, is creating a bedroom that is a sanctuary.
So here is a true story from Marla’s past – I asked my talented friend, Jeanine Mallory of Fresh Space Organizing, to help with a client’s bedroom. The woman had moved in months before, but her bedroom was boring and plain. She is a talented artist, loves color, fabric and unusual things. So we needed a makeover. By following the steps below and working together we transformed her bedroom in a day. We went shopping at Ikea! We hung purple curtains on the wall behind her bed along with sparkly lights. We brought in bright colors and candles. We used things she already had and found perfect homes for them. She now loves being in her bedroom. She is reading, journaling and sleeping so much better. How about you? Is it time for a makeover of your bedroom?
SEE IT – take a look at where you’ve been and where you are
Be brave. We invite you to take a look in your bedroom today and pretend you are a stranger. Just notice what is there and how it feels. Are there items that don’t belong in your room and that drain you when you look at them? What patterns do you notice? What do you notice that you love? Take it all in.
MAP IT – make a plan for where you want to go
How do you want your bedroom to look, feel and function? Do you want color or neutral shades or a combination? Do you want busy or simple? Do you want to add something like a reading or meditation chair? What you do want to take out or change? Take 5-10 minutes and write down what you want.
DO IT – take the actions to get what you want
Choose an hour or a day to transform your space. Give yourself this gift. Here is a super simple solution:
Set the timer for an hour and remove the following things from your bedroom:
1 – Anything that doesn’t belong in this space.
2 – Anything that is now past time or no longer relevant, like old clothes or broken furniture.
3 – Anything that doesn’t support your vision of how you want your bedroom to be.
Then set the timer for one more hour and ask what you can add or move or change so that the room feels fabulous to you!
Please let us know what you do!
Marla, Kate & Team
SEE IT. MAP IT. DO IT. © Copyright of Clear & SIMPLE, LLC. All rights reserved
